breakthroughs

one by one, we take turns giving up our secrets. it's like having pop quizzes from the universe all the time. we could be going along, having the greatest day, and then something will tear in the fabric of reality and a dossier will fly in in the form of an issue, and suddenly, deep internal buttons are mashed and we have to be quick on our feet in figuring out what the lesson is, what is being asked of us, and what we need to do to complete the challenge and collect the reward. we've gotten really good about instinctively perceiving whose lesson it is when this happens, and the other person has to serve as an anchor of sorts and guide the other person through. what might seem like a sudden, white-hot explosion of emotional confrontation to an outside observer, is the tearing open of an old, poorly-sutured wound, and suddenly, we will both be at work digging in the wound for all the darkness that can be grabbed and thrust up to the light, so the darkness loses it's power and teeth.

one of the biggest things i'm learning in all this is that sometimes, things that hurt you or confused you or traumatized you stay around you covered in an emotionally-radioactive slime, even if you've buried it so deep that you don't even remember they're there. sometimes they aren't even that big of a deal, like having felt slighted by someone years ago, or having been unfairly accused of something when you're a kid. the difference is, if it bothered you and you never told anyone, somehow that gives it a festering power, turning small things into lumps inside you that create tension and incongruity. sometimes all it takes is the act of telling someone, and within that act, you discover if the thought or experience or event actually had more negative or positive power than you realized.

the key has always been secrets with the human psyche.

the lives they lead, the underground societies they build when they're buried so deep beneath the surface.