J says (9:35 PM):
i hear you're quite the player these days
R says (9:35 PM):
Oh no!
R says (9:35 PM):
Who said that?
J says (9:36 PM):
my psychic antennae
J says (9:36 PM):
i got elves around the world who work for me
R says (9:36 PM):
Lol.
R says (9:36 PM):
Well I'm autodidactic about things. I set to learning about how to get girls, but after a while, which happened to be about a month ago, I've moved on to other interests. Well back to previous ones.
J (9:37 PM):
what were your previous interests?
R says (9:38 PM):
Mostly analytic philosophy and writing. I'm reading more about modal logic and its applications into things like metaphysics and superveniece on consciousness these days.
R says (9:38 PM):
Women aren't so complicated compared.
J says (9:39 PM):
well, people aren't that complicated compared. we can make the world as complicated or as simple as we want. the whole spectrum is interesting
R says (9:39 PM):
Totally.
J says (9:40 PM):
some people live intensely on just a few planes, some people try to explore as many as possible
J says (9:40 PM):
personally, i like living intensely in short periods of time in each
R says (9:40 PM):
That takes a lot of discipline.
J says (9:40 PM):
yes. i'm thankful you recognize that
R says (9:41 PM):
I've considered that about you from more than what's been said here. Anyway, back in Cali yet?
J says (9:42 PM):
how so
R says (9:43 PM):
I don't remember the details, but what you said about your previous job in America before Amsterdam. Something with a computer company. And then with the job you undertook in Amsterdam. Usually discipline is the only thing that holds ambition together. Emotion isn't consistent enough to fuel motivation for very long.
R says (9:44 PM):
So in Cali now?
J says (9:45 PM):
haha, everyone's always wondering where i am
J says (9:45 PM):
i've been traveling again
R says (9:45 PM):
Shit! Where are you now!
J says (9:45 PM):
but keeping it on the downlow. i felt like i was in a really tough battle for a really long time, so it's kind of like coming home from war
J says (9:46 PM):
but in a very emotional plane. so it's been an amazing time of quiet
J says (9:46 PM):
but yes, you're one of the few people who know i'm in cali
R says (9:46 PM):
You're so visual. Do you have synesthesia?
J says (9:47 PM):
what's that?
R says (9:48 PM):
It's when someone has parallel experiences from generally considered singular forms of experiences. Like a person who hears a sound but also has a sort of visual experience accompanying it. I'd guess you might have a sort of linguistic synesthesia, where your thinking is constantly accompanies by a satial, shape-like experience.
J says (9:49 PM):
hahaha! this is the most amazing thing anyone's ever said to me
R says (9:49 PM):
Anyway I was thinking about travelling a lot too. Maybe one day we could both go some places together. Like duel hking.
R says (9:49 PM):
Haha, does it sound like you?
J says (9:50 PM):
well, it's like for the first time in a long time, something made sense
J says (9:50 PM):
people are always telling me what i am. and i always try to be that person that each person needs. it takes a lot of energy but i seem to be able to do it for a little while
J says (9:50 PM):
but doing that for people really takes a lot of energy out of me
J says (9:51 PM):
but as long as i have a safe place to go back to and recharge, i can always seem to make things go in a positive direction if i really believe in it
J says (9:52 PM):
but the thing is, most people aren't so conscious so it can be really disappointing. but sometimes you see small changes in people and it makes it worth whater you're putting out
J says (9:53 PM):
the thing about basically almost stepping into another person's world, is that you're able to see a whole other universal perspective
R says (9:53 PM):
That's pretty interesting. I'm atheist (dunno if I ever mentioned it), but there's this quote in the Bible, "I am all things to all men, so that I might save some". I got it from a jazz song though, but I always liked it.
J says (9:54 PM):
do you feel that way about the world from your perspective?
R says (9:54 PM):
I mentioned the synesthesia thing because it seemed like you were selecting words that both articulated what you said and also had a spatial aspect to them.
R says (9:56 PM):
From the quote? Well, I suppose that I'm ultimately a humanist, but I'm interested in more than saving men. I'm content to say that my reasoning about what's best is dynamic, based on possibly better things I find in the future.
J says (9:57 PM):
how do you recognize people within strangers?
R says (9:58 PM):
Your question is kind of ambiguous. But I guess you're more interested in my feeling my answer than solving a problem?
J says (9:58 PM):
well, overall, where and what is your process?
R says (9:59 PM):
I suppose I leave my recognicion of a sense of commonality to peripheral feelings, and leave rationale to work itself into things that I find later on about them.
R says (10:00 PM):
My ability to accept people as "people" in a rational way can't be done: the human race isn't connected on a level of metaphysics, but on moral necessity, so far as I'm concerned.
J says (10:00 PM):
do you ever feel like wherever you're going, you're going as though you've actually arrived?
R says (10:02 PM):
I'm not sure what you mean. Where I go though, I'm careful these days to try not to think too much about arrival, and to remove thinking about myself as a part of the process. I just want to be in tune with the entire journey, and not let things like foresight and self concientiousness take my mind off of actually where I am, what I am doing.
R says (10:04 PM):
It's hard to be careful though, lol. "Being careful about concientiousness" is contradictory. You've got to lose yourself, and not put worth into realizing yourself as different from your experience.
R says (10:04 PM):
I suppose one of us should mention that I'm pretty much singing some kind of zen doctrine here.
J says (10:04 PM):
hahaha
J says (10:04 PM):
yeah, you were starting to lose me
J says (10:05 PM):
or i probably lost you
R says (10:06 PM):

J says (10:06 PM):
the strangest thing about having lived in a different country is adapting to the way people communicate. i've noticed that coming back to the states i'm so much more aware of how easy it is for people to speak different languages
J says (10:07 PM):
like we all try really hard to communicate, but the truth is there are so many ways people communicate outside of just verbal language
R says (10:09 PM):
Yeah. What I noticed most when I returned is how goddamn uptight people are! But, you're on the West Coast. I hear that there's a differerent America over there.
J says (10:09 PM):
they're more open on this side
J says (10:10 PM):
more expansive in thinking and spirit, though overall, there are pockets of small-minded people
J says (10:11 PM):
and if you're into people watching, they're really neurotic in interesting ways
J says (10:11 PM):
have you ever been to the west coast?
R says (10:12 PM):
Not even close. I'm really getting the itch to go.
J says (10:12 PM):
you should always go to places where you have itches
J says (10:12 PM):
those are the best ones
J says (10:12 PM):
because you're more determined to make an experience
R says (10:13 PM):
You're going to make me jump out of my skin!
R says (10:13 PM):
Haha.
R says (10:13 PM):
My friend and I are planning a drive out there.
R says (10:14 PM):
But I need to make sure that I have enough leave saved. I was also thinking after these 2 years here, I'll take University over there. Also, after that, I'll have lots of money saved, and I'm going to travel everywhere, and live everywhere I want.
R says (10:14 PM):
Right now the military keeps me. And keeps me crazy with these big ideas all right.
J says (10:14 PM):
man, how long are you committed for?
R says (10:15 PM):
Five years, 8 or 9 months. I'm out of here November 2010.
J says (10:15 PM):
you're free after that?
R says (10:15 PM):
Uh huh.
J says (10:16 PM):
oh my god. you're gonna be like a man getting out of prison
J says (10:16 PM):
as the chinese say, you're eyes are gonna be so wide!
J says (10:16 PM):
your
R says (10:16 PM):
Haha. It's only a prison because of my itching. But I can't wait. I need to deploy overseas one last time to save some money.
R says (10:16 PM):
I never heard that saying before.
J says (10:17 PM):
okay, i lied. it's what i say
J says (10:17 PM):
it's that moment when your entire soul just wants to devour all the things that are new
J says (10:18 PM):
like a kid the minute he sees his birthday cake
R says (10:18 PM):
Haha I like it!
J says (10:18 PM):
if you can make it through and get there, it's the end of your rainbow
J says (10:18 PM):
you better be documenting all this! write it all down. this is your story
J says (10:18 PM):
you'd better be writing like hell when you get out
R says (10:19 PM):
I'll manage.
R says (10:19 PM):
Anyway, I have to shove off.
R says (10:20 PM):
It's pretty damn later here, and tomorrow I've got a lot of conversation ahead of me. And reading too.
R says (10:20 PM):
Have a good night buddy!
J says (10:20 PM):
good luck. have a good night