I have not visited He Looks Like in almost two weeks, let alone posted any new pictures. I have developed an A-V-E-R-S-I-O-N. This could turn into a problem. I think it stems from me being pissed at this guy for agreeing to let me use his photo, then backpedaling by criticizing the photo release and acting like I was some sleazy swindler, though I'm not acutely upset over this so it just feels like a general anxiety when I think about that site. In general, I have to learn to not be so sensitive.

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I've spent most of this week analyzing the Upright Citizens Brigade's Season 1 DVD. The first half of the season was horrendous but the second half got really good. It seemed like Comedy Central started giving them more freedom, or they got more comfortable taking risks. Particularly brilliant was this piece called Albert Einstein's Audio Journal. It was broken up into three pieces interwoven between pieces of other vignettes, but the first one was priceless. Here's the transcript of Al's narration, a voice-over accompanied by images of Albert idling around his house.

"December 16th, 1921. Last night I was honored with the Nobel Prize in theoretical physics. This worldwide recognition has given me the opportunity to bring hope to a war-ravaged world. I vowed to myself I would work like a dog at this. And now...it's 10:30 in the morning and I'm just getting out of bed. I did get up early at 8am, but I just lied in bed for a while then...jerked off. "

[pounds leg apathetically with fist]

"Got to stop masturbating. Makes me toooooo lazy. Stop it, Albert..............stop it."

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Also, don't miss Andy Richter's cameo is Hansel of Hansel & Gretal. The pair enlists in the help of fairy-tale creatures to take care of a "mess," a la Harvey Keitel in Pulp Fiction. Apparently, Gretal just wanted to push her into the oven, but then Hansel went crazy with the cookie cutter. Fucking twisted.

I saw the Upright Citizens Brigade perform in New York in 1999. They did improv and Rachel Dratch and Horatio Sanz were part of the cast that night. It was awesome...I love improv anyway and am always going to the Groundlings' shows, but I just remember Rachel Dratch being the funniest looking person I've ever seen, but she was hilarious as this nasty old man who used to be the "make out king" in high school. I can't tell you how pleased I am that she ended up on SNL.

I love SNL. Good or bad, I love it. It was single-handedly the biggest influence that got me into writing.

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I've got to film something. I'm going crazy with the itch. I'm talking to Reggie and he's getting ready to shoot his film in July and he's telling me I need to get back into production and it's driving me crazy, the craving. When you get a full-time job, you really get addicted to that security and stability. Once I finish my current writing projects, that's next on my agenda. The only thing is the organization. I don't want to produce my own projects anymore because it's just too hard to concentrate on all the practical aspects of production along with directing and I want to do a project where for once, I have the luxury of concentrating on just directing. I'm going to try to convince Reggie to produce. The guy makes things happen.

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Darius Songaila posts a career-high 23 points and a season-high 12 rebounds tonight. And who was the only fantasy team out of the thousands of teams on espn who added him for tonight's game? Yup, that's right. Team Gonads and Strife. I may be the queen geek of sports geeks, but don't say I don't know my basketball.

Everyone's talking about how messed up this trade was on Sac's side. But by trading a cancer for three role players, you're about to see Sac turn into a T-E-A-M again.