shelteredgirl--there have been very few times in which I've read something that could unlock tears in me. what you just wrote was the deepest, most insightful thing i've ever read and it made me smile in a way that opens up from deep inside, for the first time in such a long while, because it reminds me that there is still so much good in this world, and as long as I know there are good people out there, it gives me hope that there is, in fact, a heaven.

I don't think heaven is any one tangible place. I think it's just a safe maternal haven where our energies can peacefully rest, knowing that there is nothing but good around them.

*****

sometimes i feel like i'm hiding out. that i'm actually quite pleased with my life and who i am, but i've learned it was safer to pretend to be miserable so that someone bigger than me wouldn't try to take away my contentment. it's so stupid, in hindsight. as most things are, i suppose. the greeks used to talk about the competition between parents and children, how they would sabotage each other, often tragically, for their own benefit. i hope that within our collective evolution as a human race and culture, we continue to move beyond that. but honestly, each one of us gets over our personal pain eventually. for me...when you're standing outside in blanketing rain as a storm dances around you, cleansing your darkness and blowing its spirit into every fiber of your inner workings, you'll suddenly be filled with that wonder again, over how amazing it is to be a part of a living, breathing world.

they say, don't get the rain in your mouth...it's poisonous these days. but i can't help it. that sweet, cool taste that lights up my tongue is like finding god again.

new beginnings are good...

new beginnings are good.