So we get to the hotel. Imperial Palace. Seriously, we were begging for adventure. Of course our clerk couldn't find the group discount on our reservation. She kept saying she would need to call someone but just standing there. We had to repeatedly ask her to make the call. Finally she left and went into the back room. I told Jessie she should have told her, "Mary, why don't you walk your pretty little self into the back and make that call?" Jessie half heartedly agreed and I said, "No really. You should have said, 'Mary...why don't you walk your pretty little self into the back and make that call?'....as you walk your fingers along the counter like little legs." I showed her. Twice to make sure she understood. "No, I just couldn't be that mean," said Jessie, even though she totally thought about it.

We totally waited for Mary for like 15 minutes.

We were abundant with theories:

-maybe she fell asleep?
-maybe she threw up.
-maybe she went on break.

We asked several clerks to check on her. They would all step into the room Mary was in, linger for about a minute, and then come out shrugging and apologizing, "I uh...I don't know what she's doing in there. She's...uh, calling."

Which made me curious what was going on in that room with Mary that could so confuse and discombobulate fellow coworkers.

Finally I went to the manager, told her that the discount was on this bill, pointing her to the station where we were waiting, then took her over and pointed her to ours, therefore it should be on this bill. they were booked at the same time.

Somewhere in that, it worked. A collective lightbulb went off. It was awesome.

Meanwhile, we've lost two WangCon members to anxiously smoking, and another to a warm greeting with a new man she was meeting for the first time from the internet.

No seriously. I just said that. wtf.

Of course, I didn't know this at the time because I'm a moron. I just think they're long lost friends meeting up for a reunion who really, really want to have sex.

We check in. I'm with Cody whose flight was delayed so I have the room to myself. I think, I could take a shower, I could take a nap, or I could call my mom and rant about work. Like an addict, I call my mom. SCREAMING all my logical arguments of why I have to quit. Then cut her off because I realize I'm about an hour late for bringing some ice up to the party.

I get lost in the halls. It's like the Shining in there. Have to ride down to the elevator to recharge with human contact, finally find the room which was two halls up. Girls are getting trashed.
Don disguise. Really, I'm joyous. This is gonna be so much fun.

They want to go to the Stratosphere. Remember when Vegas was my town? I know about the Stratosphere. But they'd heard there was a club with an open bar with 4 dance floors and they were determined to find out. Energetically, the Strastosphere is my evil nemesis.

The bar is awful. Like the set of a high school play, albeit one with great financial backing. Of course there was only one dance floor open, and a lot of stupid, gawking men. One of them farted. I swear he did.

I was pretty rude about it. I hate this place. Sareet wanted to gamble. She asked if it's rude that we just leave? I say no and damn near drag her out of the club. I don't remember what we played. But the place sucked the money right out of us. Good thing I let it know I didn't fucking care. I only brought a little bit.

We went back in and the girls were dancing on the bar. I was amazed they weren't falling off. Took many pictures as proof of feet. Then sat down and looked only at people's butts. I was so so sleepy every guy who crept towards me irritated me. Sometimes I'll simmer glare at a man like I just might eat his head like a tiger. Sometimes it makes me feel guilty when doing this scares someone.

and then between 2:45am and 3:50am as mostly weird lurkers remained-

dear god: these guys are morons. you have spawned morons. are we breaking your heart yet, god? because you're breaking mine.

and at 3:55am I demanded food and dragged the girls out.

peppermill

i saw the biggest mound of nachos that it actually looked like a cartoon prop. i didn't get a picture of it because i was scared to look directly at it.

5:30am
stumble and sleep.

11am
woken up by a loud aerobics instructor somehow under our window, followed by 80's cover band in the cabana below. i tough it out for another hour, determinedly incorporating all these strange sounds into my dream.

12pm
shower. I asked Cody what time it was and her clock was wrong. I was too polite to correct her.

imperial palace

i hate gambling here, too. but i love the dealertainment. i secretly love aretha the best and am terrified of the rod stewart.

i lose. we walk around the strip, they're gonna play games at planet hollywood, i wanna go to espn zone to shoot some hoops so i leave. truthfully, i kind of wanted to be alone. to be able to step back and see what was going on around me.

walked all the way down, checking out stores and wares and people. Bought a pack of dark peanut m&m's at the m&m store. when the cashier asked me if i wanted to get 7 for a better deal, i lied and said it was for my blood sugar because i'm diabetic.

ate the whole bag by the time i crossed the street to nyny. hate this place too. love going upstairs at the espn zone.

you want to know which me comes out now? definitely the tiger. i charge up my card and wait until a crowd gathers at the basketball hoops. then i politely ask a guy if he's next, and he'll undoubtedly wave for me to go first. then i kill it. sometimes i start off hitting my first seven shots, sometimes i hit 3 out of 4 and then go on an 8 straight tear. i never pay attention because i'm focused on just getting the job over with and then standing back later.

guys don't know what to do. i challenge some who don't know me and they think, oh that's so cute. and then i kill them by 20 pts. some of them get really upset with themselves, so i just tell them, don't worry. no one's beat me yet today. it seems to make them feel better. but sometimes they leave wondering if it was an insult.

one guy i sucker punched with a challenge in front of his more fit friend and while he was decent, he got beat by 14. he wanted to play me again so this time, i beat him 44 to 16. it's okay, i tell him. he's kind of embarrassed but laughing it off. i start giggling to myself. what? he asks. i think that's my high score today. he leaves but talks to me later and wants to know where i'm from. i tell him i'm from la but thinking of moving to sf. he says that's where he is, and wants to know where i would move to. but he's kind of doofy so it's not like he isn't gonna end of hating me. so i say that i don't know and we play again. okay, i let him win. he needed it. so i tell him afterwards, he's the first person to beat me today and that makes him happy. he asks me if i know when I'll know if I'm gonna move. I want to say, "....uh...why? because then i'll call you to let you know?" but instead, looked caught off guard and then said, "No, sorry."

i play the boxing game that counts your calories. i'm very good at this game. it's not that intelligent and i cheat.

as i'm leaving, a guy in his 40's chases me down the stairs. "I can tell you work out," he yells as he hurries after me. "You can tell from your arms. And your shoulders." "Thanks!" i say as I take the last 3 steps in 1 leap and i go for the door.

outside. freedom. still crazy out here. hoof it back to the hotel. talk to michael then my mom. ask her what she's doing. she says, putting on make-up. i happen to look down at the same time and see an open girlie magazine. the girl was ugly. "eww," i say looking at the girl. "julia..." my mom says, embarrassed, thinking i was talking to her. "no, mom, you're beautiful," i say. she says she has to go and i tell her she can't because i'm so bored. she puts my grandma on the phone. oooh, triiicky...

fall asleep listening to coldplay's parachutes which i haven't listened to since i stopped liking chris martin. wake up and it's time to get ready for wang.