it's like this. think about a wolf pack. you're either an alpha female or beta, the equivalent of a 2nd wife. some women are aware of their position and accept it. others are aware and do not, so they challenge the alphas. two alphas can not exist in the same pack, though two alphas can forge a balance and kinship, joining two packs. once a young woman emerges as an alpha, she either has to challenge the pack's alpha, submit as a beta, or leave the pack. in a way, this initiation makes the alpha, and depending on how she leaves (if this was a moralizing experience giving her optimism, or a demoralizing experience giving her cynism), she'll either stay aloof, or start her own pack. but her only match is another strong, male alpha.

the lone operator
the ultimate team player
but totally self-sufficient

this description is your mark. you both bear this mark. it's these matching marks that bring you together.