Today's Music Recommendation: Howie Day - Australia ... freakin' AWESOME CD.

Currently in my CD Rotation:
1. Howie Day - Australia
2. Blur - Think Tank
3. Morcheeba - Charango
4. Radiohead - OK Computer
5. Dave Seaman - Back to Mine

Call me weird, but I just did a comparative lyrical analysis on the recorded version of this song and on a version recorded at a performance before the recorded version was made.

Ghost
by Howie Day

Lately I've been thinking
Lately I've been dreaming with you
I'm so resistant to this type of thinking
Oh, now it's shining through
I was alone for the last time
Before my night's vacation with you
Alive from the first
Now I'm denied by the ghost of you

You take yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please

I know there's little use in crying
It's more wide awake and dying then I'm used to
I thought we'd walk these streets together
Now I'm hoping that I'll never have to meet you
Step aside from all this anger
And somewhere in between I can feel you
Ask me should we try again
I'm thinking no
Y'know, it's not what I believe in
It's not what I believe in

You take yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please
You make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please

No I, wanna taste you, love
No I...no I
No I, just wanna taste you, love

Standing in your shoes
I turn and now
You're standing bare in my doorway
I only wish that I had been prepared
I'm gonna have to go along with your way
Just take the plastic camera out
It's the pants you borrowed in the driveway
Alive from the first
Now I'm denied by the ghost of you

Make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please
You make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please

No I, wanna taste of love
No I...

I was alive from the first
Now I'm denied by the ghost of you



Ghost (Live Version)
->if you've never heard it, download it. In some ways, it sucks, but in other ways, it's fucking awesome.

Lately I've been thinking
Lately I've been dreaming of you
I'm so resistant to this type of thinking
Somehow it's shining through
I was alone for the last time
Before my night's vacation with you
Alive from the first
Now I'm denied by the ghost of you

You make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please

I know there's little use in crying
I no wide awake and dying than I'm used to
I thought we'd walk these streets together
Now I'm hoping that I'll never have to meet you
Step aside from all this anger
And somewhere in between I can feel you
Askin' should we try again
I'm thinking no
Y'know, it's not what I believe in
It's not what I believe in

Make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please
Make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
I'm standing in your doorway

Oh how you tasted love
No, how you've tasted love

Standing in your shoes
I turn and now
You're standing bare in my doorway
I only wish that I had been prepared
I'm gonna have to go along with your way
Take the plastic camera out
It's the pants you borrowed in the driveway
Sit around around and think about just why
nothing's left to say
nothing's left to say

Make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
Please
make yourself a photograph and laugh at me
I'm standing in your doorway
I'm standing in your doorway

No, you tasted love
No, you tasted love

My Analysis:

I freakin' LOVE the artist's process. I like to see drafts of people's work and be able to see the changes they've made and the direction they go and how this art goes from raw into, hopefully, a precise snapshot of an emotion (created by the artist's personal circumstances), or sometimes, an exiled interpretation of an experience the artist is trying to detach from himself by giving it less emotional power.

I think recorded versions of songs often lose that "something" because the artist's focus is challenged in the recording situation. Music is about capturing the exact emotion that is attached to the artist's private circumstances and expressing it. It's channeling. It's the same process that goes on in interpersonal therapy, in intimate moments between people, in religious, spiritual ceremonies, etc. And that's an inner journey that's very hard to take repeatedly in such a monotonous and intrusive process, so that while some takes that are ultimately accepted as the recorded version may be technically excellent, the "capture" of the emotional essence (soul) of the song may be missing. That's why some producers are very good and others are not--it's about recognizing if the soul of the song has been captured.

That said, there's a power missing from the recorded version of this song. It's not that it doesn't have a soul; it feels like a soul that has been muted by a numbing outer shell.

The artist tries too hard to be technically sound that you can hear in the way he sings that he's not really feeling what he's singing...what this song is really about...it's essence. This song is about a break-up. Probably one in which the connection was extremely powerful but for some reason, someone couldn't stay in the relationship but wouldn't exactly let the artist go, keeping him in emotional limbo. But what this song is really about, is that inner struggle within the artist...he wants to be able to tell a part of himself that clings to her that she doesn't care about him (in fact, hurts the part of himself that wants to believe in her by imagining her mocking him) and therefore, she's not worth it. Do you hear the bravado he sings "it's not what I believe in" about trying again? It's bullshit. It's the artist trying to front. You get to that verse about him standing in her shoes...he's fucking PISSED. He's totally fronting, and the rest of the song is equivalent to, "FUCK YOU! I'm better off than you. And one day when you want me back and I'm in your shoes, you'll know you fucked up." So that version of the song, the artist's state is...he's miserable, is stuck in a limbo where he doesn't want to go but she's let him go but not really let him go (stringing him along. Bitch). But he's trying to put his foot down and say he's really fuckin' walked this time. So he starts off hurt but suddenly the anger comes in and he's mad. But would he take her back? Is he really walking? Well, he's just about tantruming for there to be another round where he can have that choice. He probably obsessively fantasizes about that moment. Otherwise, he wouldn't have written this song. My guess would be that he wants it set up so there's a situation where she initiates an encounter with him and a truthful moment is created. She wants him back and he can either toss all the anger and hurt that's been built up at her (the fiery destructive scenario), or if she can make a strong enough case for herself, he'll take her back. But I think he doubts that she will have grown up enough to make a strong case for herself. He's so afraid that she's going to disappoint him. Because it would mean that his idealism and this idea of such an intimate but all-consuming connection are farce. So this whole thing should be more about him dealing with himself and wondering why it's so important that this girl accepts him or rejects him, and why he has placed so much symbolic burden on her, knowing that there's a very good chance that she'll fail. Did I just psychoanalyze Howie Day? Damn, girl. You are weird.

You can map out an artist's process through his creative output. With written words, you can only capture so much. With music, there's somewhat more dimension to the conveyance of the emotion. But face to face, it's the the most amazing thing, to be in the presence of someone in that raw process. If you listen very carefully to people when they talk, you can actually know exactly their current state and mental processes by the way they formulate their thoughts and by listening to their selection of linguistic emphases. It's like they're playing a musical instrument or a code that spells out their soul, and if you have a good ear for music, you can listen to it and be able to know in your mind, the exact procession of notes just played. So some people have an ear for music, and I have an ear for the music that people create when they express themselves. My forte is in regards to the minor notes...I am most in tune to the pain in others. The stronger the emotion or inner conflict (or the closer to the surface it is), the more prevalent it is when the person expresses himself (imagine intensity like volume...the stronger the person feels something, the louder the volume to your perception). It's really cool if you can catch it...it's like riding a wave...you'll know when you've got it and are on the same frequency. Everything just feels CONNECTED. It's kind of like those 3D digital pictures, where it's all squiggly lines and stuff, but it's actually a 3-dimensionsal dinosaur or something. You have to do to your mind, what you do to your eyes when you look at those. And then you'll suddenly find yourself able to catch a lot of a person's insides, what's important to them, what is scary to them, where they come from, where they are now and what they want and fear from the future, just from hearing them talk. Even though some people are very crafty at hiding these things by constantly saying things that erratically contradict then parallel their true meanings or feared repressed meanings (kind of the way a running back gets around defenders. Or how anti-tracking equipment bounces a signal around...a lot of backtracking, rushing and lateral moves). The smarter the person, the more complex the defense system that's hiding internal cues. It can be very frustrating. If you instinctually don't trust someone, it's because you've subconsciously picked up on someone doing this and you'll feel that he is hiding something. So for a reason you can't put your finger on, you won't trust him.

So there. I've just explained psychic ability. And a lot of useless crap.